Stripes or Pink?
by Gandalf15
Summary: Calvin and Hobbes are going to have a new babysitter, so they cook up a sneaky plan with an old friend of Hobbes's. But they don't know their new babysitter, and things soon become stranger and more exciting than anyone imagined.


**Stripes or Pink?**

* * *

 **(Author's Note: This was a story I wrote for my sister as a present a couple years ago. Maybe My writing style has changed since then, I dunno.**

 **There are some surprising twists and changes to come in this story, mwahahaha. Be ready!)**

* * *

Chapter One

"CALLLVVINNN!"

"Uh-oh!" exclaimed the yellow-headed six-year-old. He could hear his mom running up the stairs. "Quick, hide!" he told his best friend, a tiger named Hobbes. As they scrambled to find a good hiding place, Hobbes berated Calvin. "I told you she'd find out sooner or later! Now we're both gonna get it!" "Quiet!" cried Calvin, desperate to find a place to conceal himself. Suddenly, inspiration struck him. "Aha!"

Calvin's mother stormed in, livid. As much as she loved her son, he had gone too far this time! She wildly looked around the room, searching for a sign of him. However, she couldn't see any trace of him or the stuffed tiger he always dragged around. She was just about to look in the closet when she heard:

"Hobbes! Don't say 'We're definitely NOT standing behind the curtains on the windowsill', or she'll know that we are!"

Quick as a flash, Calvin's mom reached behind the curtain and pulled out Calvin and his tiger by the ears. "Hobbes, you ruin everything," muttered Calvin.

Mom glared down at the two perpetrators, and they stared up at her. Mom was the first to speak.

"Calvin, I know you like frogs, but you can't keep ten of them IN THE KITCHEN SINK! What on earth were you thinking!?" Mom didn't address Hobbes; she often ignored him. Calvin figured this was because she didn't see him as clearly as he did. Calvin replied "The way I figure, that won't be a problem if we just eat out all the time. No need to wash dishes. Those frogs are more appetizing then what you usually fix for dinner anyway."

"That's it, young man!" Mom cried. "You are going to go down there and put every one of those frogs back in the pond, but first, there's another little matter to discuss." She knelt down to come face-to-face with Calvin. "Tonight, your father and I are going to a restaurant with some friends. Now, earlier today I found out that Rosalyn is out of town, so-"

"ROSALYN IS GONE!?" cried Calvin. This was the best news he'd ever heard! He looked over at Hobbes, and the two shared a mischievous grin. Tonight was going to be fun!

Calvin's mom continued "Only for the week. She'll be back next Monday, but in the meantime, we've had to hire another babysitter. And you listen to me, young man-" Mom drew closer to Calvin's face. "-if you cause _any_ trouble for her at all, your entertainment will be cut off for two weeks. That means no television, and all your _Captain Napalm_ comics and _MAD_ magazines will be kept in our room. Do I make myself clear?"

Calvin's face fell. "Yeah," he muttered. His mom stood up and said "Good. Now please get downstairs and put those frogs back." And with that, she left.

* * *

Chapter Two

As Calvin and Hobbes dumped the last of the frogs back into the pond out in the woods behind the house, Calvin thought about what to do. He and Hobbes couldn't wreak their usual mischief with the babysitter like they used to, what with the threat mom had made. And he'd been so looking forward to the kind of fun he and Hobbes used to have with babysitters before Rosalyn. He smiled to remember those good times. Amy hadn't even lasted six minutes before she'd lost her cool.

But, as soon as his parents had found Rosalyn, all that had disappeared. She knew how to ensure complete obedience in Calvin, something that had never been done before. As a result, Calvin was terrified of her, and if he had a choice between spending all evening with Rosalyn or jumping into a lava pit filled with piranhas and people with '60s hairdos, he'd gladly choose the latter option. He might have to think about it first if the hairdos were from the '70s, however.

Calvin turned to Hobbes, who was watching the frogs jump away into the cattails. He asked "Hobbes, what should we do tonight?" "Be good?" Hobbes suggested. Calvin rolled his eyes. "Here, let me rephrase it: what should we do tonight?"

Hobbes shrugged. "Not much, mischief-wise. If we get in trouble, no comic books or magazines for you for two weeks. Which means no comic books or magazines for _me_ for two weeks."

"Well, we have to do SOMETHING. I'll go crazy if-"

BLAM!

Calvin was interrupted by the sounds of gunshots.

He and Hobbes looked at each other, wide-eyed. They had never heard gunshots in real life before! "I think they came from over there!" Calvin cried. He and Hobbes ran toward a clearing.

When they got to a clearing, they saw that it overlooked a small valley, and in this valley was the source of the commotion. The first thing they saw was a short, pale man with a big nose. He was wearing old-fashioned hunting clothes, and firing willy-nilly all over the place. Then they saw a pink- well, _something_ streaking around the valley, avoiding the bullets. It was moving so fast that Calvin and Hobbes couldn't see what it was. The short man seemed to be very angry.

After a moment, the man stopped shooting. He seemed to have run out of bullets. He yelled a bunch of words Calvin had never heard before at the pink streak, then quickly ran off into the woods. After he'd gone, the pink streak slowed down and stopped, revealing what it was: a panther, completely pink from head to toe.

Calvin whispered to Hobbes "What was THAT all about?" but Hobbes wasn't listening. He was staring intently at the panther. After a moment, he said to himself "No, it COULDN'T be. Is it? Hey, it IS!" he called out to the panther. "PINKIE! It's me, it's Hobbes! Remember me, old buddy?"

The panther looked up at them, then gave a huge grin. It ran up the hill toward Hobbes, and Hobbes ran down the hill toward it. They ran into each other and ended up in a feline hug, while Calvin watched the whole thing in confusion.

After the hug, Hobbes turned towards Calvin and called "Hey, Calvin! Come here and meet an old friend of mine!" Calvin walked down the hill toward them. When he reached them, Hobbes said "Calvin, this is the Pink Panther, or as I call him, Pinkie. We were friends back in the jungle. Pinkie, this is Calvin. I live with him and his family now." The Panther nodded. Hobbes whispered to Calvin "He's not as talkative as me."

Turning back to the Panther, Hobbes asked "So what brings you to the suburbs, Pinkie?" The Panther did a series of motions and sign language, which Calvin didn't understand, but Hobbes translated. "Pinkie says that his home-jungle was torn down to make room for some business building, so now he just wanders around. Isn't that terrible?"

Calvin, however, didn't answer. An idea had just appeared in his prematurely diabolical mind.

* * *

Chapter Three

After meeting Pink Panther, he, Calvin, and Hobbes all walked back toward the house. Hobbes and Panther talked, but Calvin didn't join in. He was developing the plan that had occurred to him, and he was just putting the finishing touches on it, when Hobbes yelled "ORANGE-AND-BLACK STRIPES!" and startled him.

Calvin looked over at Hobbes. "What?" he asked in an annoyed tone. Hobbes responded "It's this old argument me and Pinkie have about whether pink or orange-and-black stripes looks better." Calvin grinned. This could be a big part of his plan! He said "How about a contest to find out?" "What?" Hobbes asked.

Calvin said "Excuse me and Hobbes for just a moment," then he pulled Hobbes away from the Panther. Calvin whispered "I mean a contest. We'll get some paint, then you and Pinkie can paint as many things as you can with your favorite color." Hobbes responded "But wait, don't you remember what your mom said about not causing trouble? I don't think she'd be very happy with a contest that involves painting everything." Calvin whispered back "Listen, we won't get in trouble as long as we don't let the babysitter see _us_ doing anything wrong. Mom and Dad have never seen Pink Panther before, so nobody can connect anything to us. It's the perfect plan!"

Hobbes thought for a second, then said "You know, Calvin, I think you're onto something there." They walked back over to the Panther. After proposing the contest, the Panther smiled and nodded enthusiastically. Calvin said "Alright, then, it's decided. Tonight we have the War of the Colors-colors-colors-colors..." Calvin imitated an echo at the last part.

Hobbes and the Panther rolled their eyes in unison.

* * *

Chapter Four

As soon as they got home, Calvin told the Panther to wait. Then he told Hobbes to hoist him up to the window looking into the living room. After several grunts and "ow"s, Calvin was standing on Hobbes's shoulders, looking in. "What do you see?" Hobbes whispered. Calvin replied "Mom's sitting in the living room reading a book. This is going to be tough." He tried to jump off of Hobbes and land on his feet, but failed spectacularly and sent them both tumbling to the ground. The Panther rolled his eyes.

Calvin got up, dusted himself off, and said "Since the plan depends on Mom and Dad not knowing that you're here, Panther, we'll have to sneak you in. Hmmm… Ah! I know!"

Calvin's mom was trying to just relax and read her book, but she found it rather difficult. She hadn't seen Calvin since he'd gone out to put all those frogs back, which meant he was probably getting into trouble. However, she was still valiantly trying to enjoy her book for as long as she could.

All of a sudden, she heard the door slam. She looked up. Calvin had just come in, his tiger tucked under his arm, but he was acting very unusual. For one thing, he was wearing a thick, bulgy jacket. For another, he was walking with his hands in his pockets and whistling, obviously trying to look as casual as possible. Mom sighed and asked "Calvin, why are you wearing a jacket?" Calvin froze and said "Uh- I'm cold."

"Calvin, it's July. How can you possibly be cold?"

"I-uh-just had a cup of iced tea and, _brrr_ , was it chilly!"

Calvin's mom eyed him warily, then shook her head and went back to her book. She could have demanded he take off the coat show her what he was hiding, but right now she just didn't have the energy.

"Phew!" Calvin exclaimed as he and Hobbes hurried into their room. "That was a close one!" He took off the jacket, revealing a very disgruntled Pink Panther wrapped around his waist. The Panther immediately hopped off him and waved his hand in front of his nose. "He _always_ needs a bath!" Hobbes laughed. "Shut up," Calvin muttered.

And so, the preparations for that evening began. Calvin and Hobbes went down to the garage to find some paint while the Panther stayed up in their room. A little while later, Calvin and Hobbes snuck back up with three cans of pink, black, and orange paint. After that, Calvin started to draw up diagrams.

Meanwhile, Calvin's mom, not suspecting any of this, tried to think of places she, her husband, and their friends could go to dinner. She pondered to herself "We could go to Frisch's- wait, no, after we took Calvin there once they put up pictures of us so the new employees would know not to let us in. Let's see, there's also Tony's Pizzeria- no, I forgot, we took Calvin there, too. I wonder if the scars on that cook's arm ever healed. Ah, well, there are plenty of restaurants in town."

Calvin and Hobbes were also deciding on locations. They had decided that the house and backyard were fair game, and were now looking at a map of the neighborhood.

"Okay, Hobbes, you go down the right side of the street and Panther takes the left side, okay?"

"No, the right side turns onto another block sooner."

"Well, maybe you could both go down another block, and then he can end at- say, where _is_ the Panther?"

Calvin and Hobbes heard splashing from the bathroom. They looked in and saw the Panther relaxing in the bath. When he looked up and saw him, the Panther waved his paw as if to say, Go ahead and make the plans- I'll just stay here. Calvin and Hobbes walked back to Calvin's room, where Hobbes explained "Pinkie's never been in a bath before. At least, not since I've seen him."

Calvin made a face. "Well, beats me why he would want to ruin his record now, but to each his own. Mom will probably blame me for the pink fur in the tub, though."

As they put the finishing touches on the map, Calvin did a checklist for everything they would need that evening.

"Pink paint? Check. Black Paint? Check. Orange paint? Check. Brushes? Check. Maps of the neighborhood? Check. Now, all we need is a stopwatch."

"Well, that should be easy. Just ask your mom for one of your dad's." Hobbes replied. Calvin shook his head. "No, Dad said I couldn't borrow any more of his watches after last time, despite my telling him that those scorch marks had already been there. Besides, Mom might want to know what we need it for."

Hobbes shrugged. "Well, I guess we can't do that, unless you want to sneak into your dad's office and steal one from your his desk." Calvin jumped up and cried "BRILLIANT idea, Hobbes! That's just what I'll do!" Hobbes groaned. "Me and my big mouth!"

A few minutes later, Calvin was prepared for, as he called it, "Operation Sneak-Into-Dad's-Office-and-Steal-a-Stopwatch". Hobbes had commented on how short and succinct it was.

Calvin handed Hobbes a walkie-talkie. "Here," he said. "I'll sneak into Dad's office, while you watch Mom down the stairs and warn me if she comes toward me on the walkie-talkies. Got it?" Hobbes sighed and nodded.

"Good. Here I go!"

Calvin cautiously walked down the stairs and out of sight. Hobbes watched Calvin's mom from the top of the staircase and listened to him report on what he was doing on the walkie-talkie.

"Okay, Hobbes, I've made it to the desk. I'm gonna look through the drawers now. Wow, they don't seem very organized. Here's a stapler, some thumbtacks, a few pens, and- eww, what _is_ this? Is this a sandwich!? Who knew Dad was secretly such a slob?"

After a few moments filled with the sound of rummaging…

"Okay, I've searched through all the other drawers, so this last one should have his watches in it. Let me- OW!" Hobbes heard a snapping sound, Calvin cry out, and the crash of the walkie-talkie hitting the floor. He looked through the vent at Calvin's mom, but she didn't seem to have noticed the noise.

A minute later, Calvin appeared in the doorway. He had the stopwatch, but his right hand was red and swollen. He handed Hobbes the walkie-talkie and stopwatch and cried "Did you know Dad has MOUSETRAPS in his desk!?" Hobbes laughed and laughed.

Calvin angrily snatched away his walkie-talkie and put it away with the other one. Then he set down the watch beside the maps and buckets of paint. Then he stood back and looked at the checklist, still massaging his right hand. He said "Well, that's everything we need. Now me, you, and the Panther just wait for tonight." "What's the name of our babysitter? Did your mom say?" asked Hobbes. Calvin shook his head. "No, but the fact that it's not Rosalyn is good enough for me!"

Hobbes shrugged. "I guess so. I don't think anyone but Rosalyn is a match for you."

Calvin and Hobbes, however, were making the mistake of underestimating their babysitter.

* * *

Chapter Five

DING-DONG!

The doorbell rang. Calvin's mother ran to answer it, applying her lipstick as she did so. "The babysitter's here!" she called to her husband and son, who were in the living room. Calvin's mom opened the door to see a young, attractive brunette standing on the doorstep. "Hello! You must be Nancy Drew!" greeted Mom.

Nancy smiled. "Yes, I am. It's nice to meet you." Mom smiled back. "Your father's told my husband so much about you. They work at the same law firm, you know. Anyway, I want to thank you for coming on such short notice; it really means a lot." "No problem," replied Nancy. "At first, I wasn't sure that I could make it because I was in the middle of infiltrating a smuggling ring, but that ended early. Now hopefully I can go the whole night without seeing someone getting robbed or witnessing any strange, flashing lights, right?" Nancy laughed, as did Mom, although her laugh was distinctly more nervous and forced.

"Please come in," invited Calvin's mom. Nancy followed her inside. Once inside, Calvin's dad greeted Nancy with the same types of words ("Your father's told me all about you..." etc.). While this was going on, however, Calvin and Hobbes were spying on them from the top of the stairs.

"What do you think?" asked Calvin. Hobbes shook his head. "Normally, I can smell how gullible and breakable people are, but the perfume she's wearing-"

"What? You can't smell that!"

"Yes I can! _All_ tigers can."

"Uh-huh." Calvin shook his head, unconvinced, then looked back at the baby-sitter as she talked to his parents. She actually seemed pretty smart, but Calvin, Hobbes and the Panther had come too far to cancel the plan now.

"Come on, Hobbes."

They crept back up the stairs.

"Goodbye! Have a nice evening!" Nancy called to Calvin's parents as they pulled out of the driveway. After they were out of sight, Nancy closed the door and walked back into the living room, reflecting on how desperate to get out of the house they'd seemed to be. Ah well, she looked forward to meeting their son. He sounded like a very interesting young man.

Nancy called up the stairs "Calvin? Are you up there? Come on down, we'll get to know each other." After a moment, a blond-haired boy came down the stairs dragging a stuffed tiger. He eyed her warily. "Hello," said Nancy, "I'm Nancy Drew. You must be Calvin." "Charmed," muttered Calvin, still looking at her suspiciously.

Nancy gestured to Hobbes. "And who's this?" she asked. Calvin was surprised. No babysitter had ever asked him _that_ before. Trying not to let his surprise show, he answered "Hobbes." He then turned around and bolted back up the stairs. "Where are you going?" Nancy called. "To -er- to the bathroom!" Calvin called back.

When he and Hobbes got upstairs, the Panther was waiting for them. Calvin whispered "She seems pretty observant. We better be on our toes tonight." Hobbes, who was looking back downstairs, remarked "Yeah, she seems pretty observant, but she also seems just pretty." Calvin made a face and whacked Hobbes on the back of the head. "You moron! This is no time to get all gross over a girl!"

Calvin laid out the map so Hobbes and the Panther could see. "Alright," he said, "I'll go over everything one more time: when I start the stopwatch, Hobbes will start painting down the right side of the street, and Panther will start painting down the left. I'll set the watch for a few hours. When time's up, I'll use my flashlight to flash a signal to you both. Now, I'm going down to distract the babysitter while you two sneak out to the front of the house. Now, _be careful_ , because this babysitter seems sharper than most. Ready? Let's do this!"

While Hobbes and the Panther grabbed the buckets of paint and brushes, Calvin went downstairs to the kitchen. He fond Nancy reading the instructions on the back of a frozen dinner. She looked up and smiled at him. "Hello, Calvin," she said. "Do you like fish sticks?" Calvin, who seemed rather nervous, said "Say, Nancy, there's this one spot on our living room wall that _moves_ if you stare at it long enough." Nancy looked confused. "Really?" Calvin nodded. "Yeah, and we can't figure out what it is. Could you come and take a look at it?"

Nancy shrugged and said "Okay. Show me." Calvin led her into the living room. He pointed at the wall.

"There."

Nancy looked. "I don't see anything."

As Nancy stared intently at the wall, Calvin heard the scuffling footsteps- or, rather, _paw_ steps- of Hobbes and the Panther behind them. He closed his eyes and did his best to will Nancy not to turn around. It must have worked, because he heard the two felines walk out the door while Nancy was still looking at the wall.

Finally, Nancy turned around to face Calvin. "Calvin, I didn't see anything." Calvin replied "Uh- then you must have gotten rid of it! Thanks a lot!"

Nancy was more confused than ever. But she shrugged and went back into the kitchen. As she did so, Calvin said "Hey, I-er-I left a toy outside earlier. Can I go back out and get it?" Nancy replied "Well, alright, but make sure to stay where I can see you out the window."

Calvin nodded and ran out the door. Hobbes and the Panther were waiting on the sidewalk with the paint. Calvin whispered "Alright, on your mark. Get set. _Go_!"

* * *

Chapter Six

Nancy watched Calvin from the kitchen window. She frowned. It didn't _look_ like Calvin was retrieving a toy. It was hard to tell in the dim evening light, but it looked like he was talking to someone, although she couldn't see anyone else. _Probably an imaginary friend_ , she reasoned. She smiled to herself. Little kids were so innocent and playful.

Meanwhile, outside, Hobbes and the Panther had taken off. The Panther had started running to the left and was now splashing pink on everything in sight- trees, cars, houses. Hobbes had gone off in the right direction and was doing the same thing, only he was using the brushes to paint alternating orange-and-black stripes. They were both doing pretty well. Calvin just hoped that no evening passers-by would get in their way during their mad painting spree. He shuddered to think of what might happen then.

Nancy, meanwhile, had been observing Calvin standing there for a while, went to the door, and called "Calvin? Did you find your toy?"

Calvin jumped. He had forgotten about Nancy. He called back "Uh- never mind! I didn't leave it out here after all!" As he headed toward the front door, he glanced at his stopwatch. After a few more hours, time would be up, and then he would get outside and flash the signal... somehow.

Meanwhile, a block away, a black van pulled over on the corner. There was no one around, and the streetlamps were the only things keeping the street from going completely dark. From inside the black van, a man dressed in clothes that were just as black got out. As he emerged, a voice from inside the van said "You know what you have to do. Find her. Take her. Bring her here." The man nodded. As the black van drove away, the man in black turned and started walking toward the very street that, at this very moment, our feline heroes were painting.

Inside Calvin's house, Nancy was cooking fish sticks in the oven. Calvin was watching TV. He glanced at his stopwatch. Wow, time had really flown. In a little while he would have to find some way to sneak outside and flash the signal. He looked back up at the TV show. For some reason, he couldn't take his eyes off of the sickeningly wholesome and happy _Brady Bunch_. If only his family had a maid like they did. She could do all his chores, and if they played baseball with her, she could finally convince Hobbes of the rules-

Calvin's thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the oven's timer going off. Nancy called "Calvin, come on in and sit down, they're cooling off now!" Calvin switched off the TV and headed into the kitchen. As he did so, he thought about how it was probably a good thing that dinner was ready. Who knows how much more of those Brady children would have corrupted his purely mischievous brain.

As Calvin and Nancy were eating the fish sticks, Calvin asked Nancy "So… what do you do when you're not a prison ward for little kids?" Nancy chuckled. "Well, I'm a part-time investigator. That means that I solve mysteries." Calvin suddenly looked rather nervous. "Y-you mean like, crimes and stuff?"

"Yes."

"Is vandalism included?"

Nancy looked confused. "Um, it really depends. Sometimes it is." She looked at Calvin "Why?"

Calvin hastily replied "Uh-er-no reason. Just curious, heh heh. Oh, wow, look at the time!"

That last phrase wasn't just an attempted distraction by Calvin. According to the stopwatch, it was about time to end the contest. Calvin thought fast to try and come up with another way to get outside.

It turned out, though, that he didn't need to, for at that moment a sound came from upstairs. Calvin and Nancy both froze and listened. It had been a sliding, grating sound, almost as if… _a window was being opened_!

Nancy stood up slowly. She said "Calvin, I'm going to go up and see what that was. If you hear anything that sounds like danger, call 911 and tell them your address." Nancy picked up a large knife to use as a weapon and crept up the stairs.

Now by himself in the kitchen, Calvin glanced at the watch. The time set to end the contest was a minute away. So now Calvin was faced with two choices: either stay put like Nancy had said, or go outside and flash the signal. Either do the obedient thing, or the disobedient thing. The right thing, or the wrong thing.

If you guessed that he was going to do the right thing, you know absolutely nothing about him.

Calvin got up from the table, grabbed the flashlight and headed out the front door. He stood at the front of the driveway and shined the light up at the sky three times. After a minute, he saw Hobbes running toward him from one side and the Panther from the other side. When they both reached him, out of breath and panting, Calvin said "Okay, let's see who won."

Back in the house, Nancy was climbing up the stairs with the knife from the kitchen. When she reached the top she flipped on the lights. She listened. The noises had stopped, but she still felt uneasy.

She turned toward the closed bathroom door, it had seemed that the noises were coming from there. Slowly, she opened it. Everything in it seemed ordinary, except… the window was open. And the screen was lying on the floor. That didn't seem right.

Suddenly, _a hand grabbed her wrist from behind_! It twisted her wrist, and Nancy yelped and dropped the knife. She wrenched her hand free and whirled around to face a man dressed all in black, complete with ski-mask, who now had a gun _and_ the knife Nancy had dropped.

Nancy aimed a kick at him, but he ducked out of the way and lunged for her. She tried to scream for help but before she could her attacker had his gloved hand over her mouth and the gun pointed at her face. From underneath his ski-mask, he whispered "Take it easy little lady. I don't want to hurt you, but if I have to…"

In the yard below them, Calvin, Hobbes and the Panther were just walking back from Calvin's inspection of their work. When they stopped, Calvin extravagantly declared, "Feline friends, this has been a contest like no other. You have both given outstanding performances and gone where no jungle cat has gone before. Alas, there can only be one winner, and it will be my pleasure to announce that winner."

As Calvin spoke, he picked up a paintbrush and dramatically thrust it into the air like a torch. When he did this, a large glob of paint flew off of it and was flung up, up, up…

…through the bathroom window and right onto the attacker's face!

The attacker yelled and let go of Nancy and his weapons, dancing around in confusion and trying to wipe it off. But because he couldn't see where he was going, he stumbled and fell right out the window!

Down below, Calvin was just saying "I'm pleased to announce that the winner of the contest is…" when he heard something and he and the cats looked up. As they saw the black figure falling toward them, everybody just had time to scream "AAUGHHH!" before the figure landed on top of them.

No one is quite sure what happened immediately after that. All anybody who experienced it could remember was a chaotic scramble of paint, bodies, fur, and the occasional cry of a human or maybe even the yowl of a jungle cat. All anyone knows is that the result was a little boy, a grown man dressed all in black, and a couple of stuffed animals were on the ground, tangled in a heap.

The man in black was the first to try to get up and run away, but as soon as he did he slipped in the paint on the ground and fell right back down again. By this time, a bunch of Calvin's neighbors had heard the commotion and had come out to see what was wrong, and were gawking at both the Calvin, the man, and at the paint the street was covered in. One of them had called the police, and an officer arrived. He pulled the mask off of the man and exclaimed "Well, I'll be! It's Lewis Dahl Tolkien, the supposed upstanding pillar in the community!"

"That's right!" By this time Nancy had run down the stairs and joined the people in the yard. She explained "It's all part of a mystery that I've been investigating. Mr. Tolkien must have spied on me telling George that I was sure he was part of the smugglers ring, so he must have come here to get me before I could prove it!"

"Well, Mr. Tolkien," said the police officer, "looks like you'll be going to jail for a long time. But I still don't understand what this boy has to do with this, and where all this paint came from?" "Yeah," said Calvin, who was still very confused despite Nancy's explanation, "What _do_ I have to do with this?"

Nancy replied "Calvin must have thrown that glob of paint that made him fall out the window. He's a hero!" Then she looked around. "And- I don't know where all this paint came from."

Everyone looked at Mr. Tolkien, who said "Don't look at _me_!" Then everyone looked at Calvin, who said "Er- don't look at _me_!"

The police called Calvin's parents, who came right home. They too were very confused, but were relieved that Calvin was okay. Nancy's father, Carson Drew, came as well. After making sure Nancy was alright, he said to Calvin "Son, you saved my daughter's life tonight. I'm very grateful to you." Calvin puffed himself up with pride at these words. He said to Mr. Drew "Well, just keep that in mind, Mister, 'cause you never know when I'll need a lawyer again." "Er- okay," said Mr. Drew, rather confused by this statement.

After everybody's parents had made sure everybody was safe, the police officer from before walked up to Calvin, Hobbes, the Panther, Nancy, Calvin's dad, Calvin's mom, and Mr. Drew, and said "Well, folks, I radioed the station, and it turns out that there's a reward for bringing the thief and his gang to justice. Calvin and Nancy could probably split it between them." "REALLY!?" yelled Calvin. "How much!?"

The policeman wrote it down on a piece of paper and showed it to everyone. Calvin stared and said "And if we split that in half that means we each get-" "Yep," said the policeman. "YAHOO!" yelled Calvin "Hobbes, did you hear that? We're gonna be RICH!"

"Unfortunately, Calvin," said Calvin's dad, "you won't be able to spend any of it." "Why not?" asked Calvin. "Because," replied his dad, "you'll have to use it to pay for all the damage caused by your PAINTING THE ENTIRE NEIGHBORHOOD!"

"WHAT!? What makes you think it was me!?" protested Calvin.

Calvin's parents, Nancy, and the police officer all proceeded to tell Calvin why he was most likely responsible. Despite his attempts at pinning the crime on the Pink Panther and trying to convince everyone that he was innocent, Calvin had been caught with the jungle cats and the paintbrushes, so nobody believed him.

* * *

Chapter Seven

After everyone had left, and Calvin was made to promise to use his reward to pay for whatever the paint couldn't be scraped off of (despite his protests), Calvin, Hobbes, and the Panther met in the backyard. Calvin said "Well, guys, it was fun having this contest, even if I-I don't get any reward m-money." Calvin started to sniffle. Hobbes rolled his eyes. The Panther smiled and shook Calvin and Hobbes's hands. Hobbes said "So long, Pinkie. Happy hunting!"

The Panther walked back to the edge of the woods, turned around, waved, and disappeared into the trees. Calvin wiped his tears away and asked "So, he's going back on the road again?" Hobbes nodded. "Yeah. Actually, I think he sort of likes it." Hobbes turned to Calvin. "He might like it, but I wouldn't. I'd miss you." Calvin wrapped his arms around Hobbes in hug. "Thanks, ol' buddy."

As they walked back up to the house, Hobbes asked "By the way, who _was_ the winner? You got interrupted before you could say, and we forgot about it in the excitement." At this, Calvin straightened up smugly. "Well, my friend, the answer is none other than: me! I won because I was able to create lots of mischief without having to lift a finger. You two chumps did it all for me!"

Calvin suddenly realized that Hobbes was looking angry, and that he was starting to open his claws. Calvin started to back away nervously, saying "H-hey, take it easy o-old buddy! Did I call you a ch-chump? I meant, uh, CHUM! Yeah, that's what I meant! 'Cause we're such good friends… right? Hey, st-stay away from me! Hey! _Hey_!"

And Hobbes began to chase Calvin all around the yard.


End file.
